? Joe Morrison, the new football coach at South Carolina, on moving to Columbia after having coached at the University of Tennessee-Chattanooga and the University of New Mexico: "At least I can spell it. I spent five years learning to spell Chattanooga, then we moved to Albuquerque."
? Joe Altobelli, who required hospital care last month after falling off the dais at the first of several banquets he attended upon being named the Baltimore Orioles' new manager: "I'm on a streak. This is the fourth banquet in a row where I haven't fallen off the dais. Of course, the first two don't count because they handcuffed me to the head table."
?Jack Berkshire, basketball coach at Oglethorpe University: "We've been a little up and down all season, but I'd call that consistency."