IT AIN'T OVER, RUNNER-UP
To the Brewers' 39-year-old designated hitter, Dave Parker, whom the A's didn't resign at the end of last season. As of Sunday, Parker was hitting .290 with 21 homers and 92 RBIs. A steal at $3 million for two years.
DR. STRANGELOVE AWARD
To Andy Van Slyke of the Pirates. Upon learning that Pittsburgh's record in the Astrodome was 6-18 over the last four years, Van Slyke made the following proposal: "When Bush and Gorbachev have their summit meeting, they should agree on a missile test. One missile [each]. We get to test ours wherever in Russia we want. They have to test theirs at the Astrodome."
?More errors than RBIs (minimum 10 errors)—Edgar Diaz, Brewers (17 to 14 at week's end).
?At least 100 more K's than walks—Andres Galarraga, Expos (166 to 40); Sammy Sosa, White Sox (148 to 32).
?Fewest RBIs by a hitter with at least 20 homers—the Yankees' Kevin Maas, who as of Sunday had 39. The major league low of 43 RBIs was hit by Carlton Fisk in 1984 and Fred McGriff in '87.
FATHER KNOWS BEST AWARD
To Bud Johnson, whose son, Randy, pitches for the Mariners. After Randy threw a no-hitter against the Tigers on June 2, he called his parents. "I talked to my mom, she was crying," says Randy. "My dad, my biggest critic, wanted to know why I walked six."
A 14K GOLD BRICK
To Keith Hernandez of the Indians. He looked bored from the start, hit .200 with one homer and eight RBIs in 130 at bats and took the last three months off with a pulled left calf muscle. Not bad for someone getting $3.5 million over two years. Why doesn't he just retire?
THE BILL VEECK AWARD
To Mariners owner Jeff Smulyan, for doing everything short of inserting part-owner David Letterman in the lineup to lure fans to the park. His master stroke was Guaranteed No-Hitter Night, a June 16 meeting between Nolan Ryan and Matt Young, for which customers were promised a free ticket to another game if a no-hitter wasn't thrown. Smulyan ended up giving away 37,248 freebies after the Mariners won 5-0 behind Young's three-hit pitching. In early August, after a game against the Yankees, Smulyan was a guest on Seattle catcher Scott Bradley's radio show at a bar near the Kingdome. "The New York writers went nuts," said Bradley. "Can you imagine George Steinbrenner sitting in a New York bar answering questions from fans?"
THE STEVE BLASS AWARD
To Squeezer Thompson, who was in the Padres' system. In his 18 innings for Class A Charleston ( S.C.), he walked 46 batters, hit six and threw 18 wild pitches. Thompson was released in June.