Jose Canseco is
doing the Jose Twitch. Everybody now! Crank your neck east, then crank your
neck west, open your eyes extra wide, close them and open them again, gyrate
your jaw, twitch your shoulders convulsively, arch your back, lift your knee up
to your chest then put it back down again. Now, repeat between pitches.
The Jose Twitch
sets the teenage girls off. Sometimes they even scream when he does it.
Much of the
twitching is done to keep his back and neck loose, but a lot of it is pure
habit. One time, as Canseco was watching one of his homers fly, he
absent-mindedly bent his right knee up to his chest. It may be the first time
ever somebody has warmed up for a home run trot.
wants to be the male Madonna. "Yeah," he says, "in the sense of
treading new areas. Somebody who's willing to take risks, somebody who isn't
afraid to speak out, somebody who isn't bullshitting around, somebody with some
already be the male Madonna. He's got the body. Photographer Annie Leibovitz
liked it so much she stripped him to the waist for an American Express ad that
has raised the country's estrogen level 12%. USA Today voted him Sexiest
Athlete of 1988. Detroit manager Sparky Anderson once said Canseco had the
"physique of a Greek goddess." There is little doubt that Canseco leads
all zip codes in femail. And besides, who's a better Material Boy?
Jose Canseco has
come to the conclusion that he needs a bodyguard. "Nothing serious," he
says. "Just somebody with a black belt who knows how to handle an
Where are you
going to find somebody like that, Jose?
kidding me?" he says. "I'm from Miami!"
1-900-234-JOSE hotline number actually works. Reporters covering the team
sometimes get good, straight answers from it. And Canseco can't accuse them of
misquoting him. Then again, there is some stuff on the hotline they might not
use. For instance:
•What time room
service ends in his Cleveland hotel.