•Sky Dome, Toronto
Since I've never been there, I'm relying on Jamie Quirk's scouting report. He reports good mounds and security guards (though I can't imagine the Toronto crowd getting too dangerous). It seems the most significant feature is the closed-circuit television camera in the bullpen, which allows the people in the dugout to see what's going on out there. This sounds much too Orwellian for me; I think the Players Association should at least demand another TV camera for the bullpen people so we can spy on the dugout.
•Jack Murphy Stadium, San Diego
Besides having its own bathroom, this bullpen has its own water fountain. Very classy. The ground out there is such that it cuts the ball up when it goes in the dirt, and that can do wonders for a relief pitcher's attitude, because suddenly his ball is really moving. The bullpen is too close to the fans, but that proves to be a plus because San Diego is the best place in either league for girl-watching.
•Dodger Stadium, Los Angeles
Plenty of seats, and it's always nice to have that option. The Plexiglas screen that separates us from the playing field is an improvement on the chain link fence we usually get. Our old bullpen coach in Kansas City, Jim Schaffer, used to say that he was going to put chain link in front of his TV at home because that's the only way he could feel comfortable watching a game.
•Three Rivers Stadium, Pittsburgh
Best feature: A seating area above the field of play—a vantage point we don't get anywhere else.
•Shea Stadium, New York City
It has plenty of acreage, the mounds are decent, and the fans are far enough away, but I don't like it. For one thing, there's the constant strafing by low-flying aircraft. There's no place in baseball for La Guardia Airport, and La Guardia Airport is no place for baseball. There also is not a lot of cleaning up done at Shea. So until somebody brings a broom or changes the flight patterns, this is a bad bullpen.
•Wrigley Field, Chicago
The bullpen is right behind the first baseman, with barely enough room for two pitchers to warm up at the same time. And there is zero distance between you and the fans.
•Candlestick Park, San Francisco
I think I'll like pitching for the Giants—so I don't have to be in the visitors' pen. Their fans are the toughest in the National League.
•Arlington Stadium, Texas
Basically, you're in a pillbox here. Saved only by the nachos.
•Busch Stadium, St. Louis
A sideline pen with, as mentioned earlier, potential for great embarrassment.