Positively Pessimistic

No matter. Merten holed the putt, and Alfredsson, who missed a 15-footer on 18 that would have forced a Monday playoff, was left with the terrible thoughts. "I don't know if I've ever felt this disappointed in my life," she said.

As for Merten, all she could do was giggle, talk breathlessly and carry on like someone who had suddenly discovered herself loved and admired. "People call me the Garbage Queen," she said, referring to her good short game. "It's fun to miss greens and pull off shots." When asked about her left leg, which, because of a childhood sports injury, is three centimeters shorter than her right one, she quipped, "I wish it was the other leg—I could have had an uphill lie all my life."

Merten, however, had no real explanation for her stunning victory at Crooked Stick. She could only shrug and say, "I just hit some shots that I'll probably never hit again."

That's Lauri Merten for you—putting the best possible outcome in the worst possible light.