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Just My Type
Dan Patrick
June 16, 2008
The Interview Tito Ortiz MIXED MARTIAL ARTIST
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June 16, 2008

Just My Type

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DP: Damn, I don't get people like that on MySpace.

TO: [She said] I'm coming to your fight. Where's your after party? I was fighting Ken Shamrock. I beat him, and she came to the party.

DP: Do you have to say to your friends, Get rid of the porn with her, O.K.?

TO: My friends all watch it. I can't watch it any more—I won't watch it. [Laughter] Whatever, that was her past, and it's fine. My past was pretty bad.

Boston Knee Party

ETIQUETTE QUESTION: If you're carried off the court and placed in a wheelchair, like Paul Pierce was during Game 1 of the NBA Finals, don't you need to stay out for more than two minutes of game time? Pierce's quick comeback should be good news, but the drama of his exit leaves you feeling duped. Regardless, though, save that wheelchair. Because if Boston wins the series, Pierce's ride will be up there with Paul Revere's for Celtics fans, and this is a town that needs to take better care of its sports artifacts. Curt Schilling's bloody sock from the 2004 ALCS went to the laundry. Jonathan Papelbon's last-out ball from the 2007 World Series was chewed up by his dog. Those Spygate tapes were destroyed by the NFL. Isn't Boston supposed to be about preserving history, not throwing it away?

Placing the Calls

AT A friend's house I was offered a bottle opener that, when used, plays John Sterling's trademark, "Yankees win—Theeeee Yankees win!" I switched to twist-offs, but these broadcast calls might work better with the right products.

1. "BACK! BACK! BACK!" Chris Berman's home run call replaces the beep-beep-beep of trucks backing up.

2. "THE KISS!" What woman wouldn't want to hear Bill Raftery's bank shot call when she uncaps her lipstick?

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