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THE SHOW
Bill Scheft
January 27, 2003
Good to be here. By applause, how many of you think we should be able to challenge two Super Bowl ads per half?
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January 27, 2003

The Show

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Ohio state high school officials are investigating the gift. If there's any impropriety, LeBron will lose his amateur status. I think I speak for fans everywhere when I say, "What amateur status?"

KELLOGG'S FROSTED FLAKES NAMED OFFICIAL BREAKFAST CEREAL OF THE NHL
Only they had to change Tony the Tiger's catchphrase to "They'rrrre solvent!"

Two weeks ago there was one bankrupt team in the NHL. Now there are two. I'm telling you, this cloning thing really works.

There were hints the Sabres were in trouble financially. Former owner John Rigas's autobiography begins on Chapter 11.

The Sabres may be forced to relocate. Isn't this a little like saying Diana Ross may be forced to get a designated driver?

But wait. A last-minute buyer for the Senators has emerged. Maybe you know him—Joe Millionaire?

RUMORS SAY STEVE LAVIN THINKING OF RESIGNING AT UCLA
Apparently he only has enough mousse to last through non-conference games.

The rumor mill also says Lavin could be headed in the direction of Toledo. Bob Toledo.

MIKE TYSONS DIVORCE IS FINAL
Tyson agreed to pay Monica Turner $6.5 million in future earnings. However, the purse may be withheld by the state of Nevada.

WNBA MAY AWARD FRANCHISE TO M0-HEGAN SUN
Oh, I hope I'm not too late with a name. The Casino Bouncers.

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