It's true, the cable networks and newspapers are filled with scary headlines written in jargon that has come to symbolize the depressing reality of our economic state. But it doesn't have to be so. Take those same terms, process them through the SI GOLF PLUS Vocabulary Converter, and suddenly they're not so frightening anymore.
Putting a seven-wood in the bag
Three-hundred-yard drives followed by bladed wedges
When your opponent forces you to hole out a 12-inch gimme. Also known as "credit crunch" or "credit squeeze"
All de things de matter with de swing
Adam Scott's (right) swing compared with Tiger Woods's circa 2001
What you're no longer spending in the pro shop
The sense of completeness a player feels after pushing his drive onto the next fairway and screaming, "Fore!"