Big Ticket in for big season

It's that time again, that wonderful time of year where Clippers and Hawks fans gear up for those 14 games their teams are in contention while New Orleans fans try to figure out a way to somehow will the Hornets into the playoffs despite being the prohibitive favorite to finish last in the Central Division.

It's the start of another NBA season, when hope springs eternal and the Bobcats are in a dead heat for the top spot in the Eastern Conference. So without further ado, I give to you this year's preseason picks, guaranteed to be 99 percent accurate or your money back.

MVP: Kevin Garnett, Minnesota. A very wise man (or maybe a very old wrestler) once said to be the man, you've got to beat the man, and until anyone proves that they can dominate the game on both ends of the floor the way KG does, my vote goes to the man in the Twin Cities. Last season he proved to everyone he was capable of carrying a team deep into the playoffs (and for those of you who still don't believe, ask yourself this: What do Laphonso Ellis, Dean Garrett, and Anthony Peeler have in common? Answer, they were all members of KG's illustrious supporting cast before the arrival of Mssrs Sprewell and Cassell). Put quality players around Garnett, and he's the best in the business. This season he has the added advantage of knowing that there is no 7-foot monster in Hollywood waiting for him at the other end of the tunnel.

RUNNER UP: Shaquille O'neal.

DEFENSIVE PLAYER OF THE YEAR: Ben Wallace, Detroit. With all due respect to the enigmatic Ron Artest, who also thinks he's the "best player in the league," Wallace was robbed last year and is going to continue to get robbed every time the NBA doesn't give proper due to the only guy in the league who has the ability to alter an opposing team's entire game plan. Wallace played out of position for the better part of last year, but once Rasheed Wallace came on board he was able to play more off the ball and wreak havoc from the weak side.

RUNNER UP: Artest.

ROOKIE OF THE YEAR: Ben Gordon, Chicago: Not quite as sexy as last season's Lebrellopalooza is it? Teams entered the draft calling it a crap shoot and sure enough wound up going home with crap. After the first 10 picks I was waiting to see if any of the remaining 19 GMs had the chutzpa to hand David Stern a card with the worst four letter word he could ever step to the podium and say: P-A-S-S. I think the Bulls had the right idea in '96 when they drafted Travis Knight with the last pick in the first round and promptly renounced him. You think Jerry Krause stays up nights regretting that decision? That said, Gordon is the most NBA-ready player in the draft, which isn't saying much.

RUNNER UP: Rafael Araujo, Toronto

SIXTH MAN: Joe Johnson, Phoenix: What were the Suns thinking? First they sign Steve Nash to a contract that they're going to be trying to find a way out of in three years, then they bring in Quentin Richardson when they already have Johnson. Johnson had a breakthrough season in '03, nearly doubling his scoring average and playing in all 82 games for the second season in a row. And he's in a contract year, which means he'll suddenly develop a devastating 18-foot jump shot and start posting Playstationesque triple doubles. But with Q's impending marriage to Brandy, there must be a way to get the singer to warble the national anthem.

RUNNER UP: Brent Barry, San Antonio