Quick Slants: Made for TV

Perhaps the reason the SEC has some of the toughest defenses in all of college football is because the conference ... uh ... lets the refs get in on the tackling-action.

Upon seeing the now-infamous clip on Monday, I sent a quick e-mail to Campus Clicks scribe and SIOC editor Mallory Rubin asking a simple question: "Is that real?!?" But after her response ("Yessir."), my confusion remained. Yes, SEC referee Wilbur Hackett apparently threw a forearm shiver to South Carolina quarterback Stephen Garcia. And, no, nobody really seemed to give a damn until the blogosphere took the clip and ran on Monday morning.

How is this possible?

Simply put, this video clip is the stuff of which great commercials are made. Literally. It delivers the same awe-inspiring impression as LeBron James sinking full-court shots or Michael Vick throwing a football into the nosebleeds. How, then, could this sort of thing have occurred without more hoopla from the national media? Doesn't this only happen when a ref's siding with a content Buffalo Wild Wings crowd or vying for a free Bud Light from the defense?

In all fairness, the SEC tried. The conference issued a statement saying Hackett merely acted in self defense. But that hasn't quite quelled the curiosity, especially since it looks like he was playing regular defense.

While it'd be crazy to think Hackett had a vendetta against South Carolina, the official explanation doesn't quite fit the crime. So, it'd almost be better if the SEC just made something up. Say Garcia insulted Hackett's mama. Say Hackett tried to fix the game. Say a swarm of killer bees tried to swallow him alive. Say anything.

Sometimes far-fetched plays demand ridiculous excuses -- even if they're not entirely true.

Well, it's official. The Washington State Cougars have become the free space on a bingo card.

It's mean to say, but fresh off the Cougars' 69-0 loss to USC, it's becoming increasingly clear the Cougars are only interesting because they've been so grossly uncompetitive. Serious injuries at quarterback haven't helped, but you can't help but be simultaneously impressed and repulsed by their overall body of work. They're 0-6 against FBS competition and have lost by 26, 63, 49, 25, 53 and 69 points, respectively. It's hard to believe they haven't pulled an Elite XC and just packed it in.

So, I've got a proposal. Given the Cougars' current state of awfulness, college football should pass an emergency amendment: Teams should only be allowed to count their wins against Washington State if they prove victorious in the face of self-inflicted handicaps. Which is to say, if teams want to actually use this victory toward bowl eligibility, they must make things interesting by, say, limiting their protective padding, refusing to use modern technology and/or allowing power plays after every penalty.